Stevie’s New Book ‘Mind Games’ is Now Available for Pre-Order

Can porn addiction ruin a marriage? Check out the blog – preorder available! 😉

Stevie Turner

This post has been scheduled as I’m currently away on the Isle of Wight.

Mind Games is now available for pre-order.  It shines a light on the effect that an addiction to pornography can have on a previously happy marriage.  The story is told from the perspectives of both the husband and the wife.

http://bookShow.me/B073YHXSJH

Frances Andrews is sick of her husband Martin’s addiction to pornography, and has lost her trust in him. Martin views porn as a harmless pastime, but when Frances threatens to leave, he is distraught and begs her to go with him for marriage guidance therapy. Counsellor Rhona suggests they take a holiday in the first instance, and start talking to one another again. Frances just wants out of the marriage, but finally agrees to go on a cruise…as long as they have separate cabins.

Here’s a little sample from Chapter 1:

FRANCES

She could not bear the sight…

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Everything That Will Tempt You to Quit Writing–and How to Deal with It

Very good post – more than worth your time! 😉

A Writer's Path

by Meg Dowell

Pursuing a career in writing comes with plenty of obstacles. Overcoming those obstacles — especially when your barriers involve other people — can be overwhelming. The stress of trying to Make Writing Happen can be draining enough to force you to consider quitting. Even though you shouldn’t!

Here are a few things that will, or have already, almost convince you to stop writing — and how not to let them bring you down.

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National Day of the Cowboy


NDOTC banner


From NationalDayCalendar.com:

National Day of the Cowboy is observed annually on the fourth Saturday in July.

The era of the cowboy began after the Civil War in the heart of Texas.  Cattle were herded long before this time, but in Texas, they grew wild and unchecked.  As the country expanded, the demand for beef in the northern territories and states increased. With nearly 5 million head of cattle, cowboys moved the herds on long drives to where the profits were.

The draw of riches and adventure mixed with tales of violence and a backdrop of the Great Plains gave way to the mythological image of the cowboy.

Where the dust settles reveals much of the stoic truth of the American cowboy and cowgirl. The life of a cowboy required a particular ability to live in a frontier world.  To do so requires respect, loyalty and a willingness to work hard.

In the words of the former President Bush, “We celebrate the Cowboy as a symbol of the grand history of the American West. The Cowboy’s love of the land and love of the country are examples for all Americans.”

HOW TO OBSERVE

Celebrate with a cowboy you know and post on social media using #NationalDayOfTheCowboy.  Enjoy a western novel or movie, attend a rodeo and embrace the cowboy way of life.

HISTORY

According to the National Day of the Cowboy Organization, this day “…is a day set aside to celebrate the contributions of the Cowboy and Cowgirl to America’s culture and heritage.” The NDOC continuously pursues national recognition of National Day of the Cowboy.  Currently, 11 states recognize this day. The first celebration was in 2005.


I’m celebrating National Day of the Cowboy by posting photos of real cowboys. Most of the men below are past champions in bull riding or calf roping– Hey, wait! Is that Sam Elliott?

 

Images from Pinterest.

Yentl’s Syndrome: Taking Women’s Pain Seriously


Yentl


study in 1996 examined 1,411 patients with chest pain over the course of one and half years. They found that men were more likely to be admitted to the hospital than women. Of the women that were hospitalized, they were just as likely to receive a stress-test as men. However, the women who were not hospitalized were less likely to receive a stress-test at their one month follow-up. The authors of the study suggest that the bias against women that they recorded is due to what is referred to as Yentl syndrome.

Yentl syndrome: What is it?

You may recall the 1983 Barbara Streisand filmcalled Yentl, wherein Streisand’s character plays the role of a man in order to get the education she wants. In the case of medicine, Yentl syndrome refers to women having to prove that they are as sick as men in order to receive proper treatment. When it comes to heart pain, many women have died due to dismissing and misdiagnosing their symptoms.

The Girl Who Cried Pain

A few years ago, 21-year-old Kirstie Wilson died after being diagnosed with cervical cancer three years prior. When she was 17, she went to her general practitioner for painful stomach cramps. But he dismissed her three times as having “growing pains” or thrush. After begging to be seen by a specialist, a Pap smear revealed the cancer. Kirstie had surgery which successfully removed the cancer. However, it returned and had spread to her liver and spleen.

Before her passing, Kirstie stated, “I was bleeding in between periods and I was in agony, but doctors diagnosed me with thrush and growing pains. You know your own body and I knew there was something seriously wrong when the pain and bleeding persisted. It took me four months of going back and forth to my GP [general practitioner] before I was given a smear test. I wish I had been given a smear test when I first visited my doctor, as it might have saved my life.”

Are Women Hysterical Lunatics?

Do you realize that the word hysterectomy comes from the word hysteria? This is rooted in the Latin hystericus, meaning “of the womb.” An articlehighlighting the stigmatization of women expanded further on this idea of hysteria: “This was a condition thought to be exclusive to women – sending them uncontrollably and neurotically insane owing to a dysfunction of the uterus (the removal of which is still called a hysterectomy). Here’s another: loony. Coming from lunacy – a monthly periodic insanity, believed to be triggered by the moon’s cycle (remind you of anything?). These etymologies have cemented a polarisation of the female and male mental states: men being historically associated with rationality, straightforwardness and logic; women with unpredictable emotions, outbursts and madness.”

As outdated as this mindset is, it is actually still highly pervasive even in the medical community. After all, it was until 1993 that the National Institutes of Health mandated the inclusion of women and minorities in medical research. Prior to that, many clinical studies excluded women. In fact, that was the same year that marital rape was finally a crime in all 50 states. These delays only reinforce the frequency and normalcy of dismissing women’s cries of pain.

“Women cry – what can you do?”

A compassionate piece written by the husband of a woman who endured extreme abdominal pain explained his wife’s unnecessarily long E.R. visit. He says, “Nationwide, men wait an average of 49 minutes before receiving an analgesic for acute abdominal pain. Women wait an average of 65 minutes for the same thing.” His wife ended up waiting nearly three times that long, despite her expressions of intense agony. Every time he would ask for help while they waited for her to be examined, he said, “…every nurse’s shrug seemed to say, “Women cry—what can you do?” Even when the doctor quickly visited her bedside, he too dismissed her pain and misdiagnosed her. It wasn’t until a competent female physician came by that the woman was taken into surgery to in order to remove a dangerous and dying ovary.

When it comes to medicine, women must constantly prove that they are as sick as a man in order to receive the same treatment. This is appalling and absolutely dangerous. The pain women experience is routinely dismissed. Think of chronic conditions like fibromyalgia wherein most women must go through several healthcare practitioners, perhaps over the course of many years, just to have their pain taken seriously. Has this happened to you? How did you finally get the correct diagnosis? Were you frequently dismissed because of your pain?

 

The preceding article is from FibromyalgiaTreating.com and is posted here for sharing purposes only. For additional information please visit their website.
Image from MGM

 

 

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“News of the World: A Novel” by Paulette Jiles

Nearly 19,000 Ratings on Goodreads!


News of the World cover

“News of the World: A Novel

Genre: Historical Fiction

Release Date: October 4, 2016

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National Book Award Finalist—Fiction

In the aftermath of the Civil War, an aging itinerant news reader agrees to transport a young captive of the Kiowa back to her people in this exquisitely rendered, morally complex, multilayered novel of historical fiction from the author of Enemy Women that explores the boundaries of family, responsibility, honor, and trust.

In the wake of the Civil War, Captain Jefferson Kyle Kidd travels through northern Texas, giving live readings from newspapers to paying audiences hungry for news of the world. An elderly widower who has lived through three wars and fought in two of them, the captain enjoys his rootless, solitary existence.

In Wichita Falls, he is offered a $50 gold piece to deliver a young orphan to her relatives in San Antonio. Four years earlier, a band of Kiowa raiders killed Johanna’s parents and sister; sparing the little girl, they raised her as one of their own. Recently rescued by the U.S. army, the ten-year-old has once again been torn away from the only home she knows.

Their 400-mile journey south through unsettled territory and unforgiving terrain prove difficult and at times dangerous. Johanna has forgotten the English language, tries to escape at every opportunity, throws away her shoes, and refuses to act “civilized.” Yet as the miles pass, the two lonely survivors tentatively begin to trust each other, forming a bond that marks the difference between life and death in this treacherous land.

Arriving in San Antonio, the reunion is neither happy nor welcome. The captain must hand Johanna over to an aunt and uncle she does not remember—strangers who regard her as an unwanted burden. A respectable man, Captain Kidd is faced with a terrible choice: abandon the girl to her fate or become—in the eyes of the law—a kidnapper himself.


My website is paulettejiles.com. I review books and say shocking things and include outrageous pictures.

Paulette Jiles was born in Salem, Missouri, in the Missouri Ozarks. Raised in small towns in both south and central Missouri, she attended three different high schools, an exhausting process of social dislocation and fashion wobbles, and with relief graduated from the University of Missouri (KC) in Romance Languages. After graduation she worked for the Canadian Broadcasting Corporation in Toronto and in the far north of Ontario and in the Quebec Arctic, helping to set up village one-watt FM radio stations in the native language, Anishinabe, and Inuktitut. She became reasonably conversant in Anishinabe but Inuktitut was just too much. Very hard. Besides she was only in the eastern Arctic for a year. Work in the north lasted about ten years all told.

She taught at David Thompson University in Nelson B.C. and grew to love the British Columbian ecosystems and general zaniness. She spent one year as a writer-in-residence at Philips Andover in Massachusetts and then returned to the United States permanently when she married Jim Johnson, a Texan. Has lived in Texas since 1995.

She and her husband renovated an old stone house in the San Antonio historic district and amidst the rubble and stonemasons and ripped-out electrical systems, she completed Enemy Women. She now lives on a small ranch near a very small town in the Texas Hill Country with a horse and a donkey. If you want a free donkey, please let her know. She plays Irish tin whistle with a bluegrass group, sings alto in choir, rides remote trails in Texas with friends. Her horse is named Buck. News of the World (William Morrow) was a finalist for the National Book Award.

“Hunger: A Memoir of (My) Body” by Roxane Gay

Nearly 6,000 Ratings on Goodreads!


Hunger cover

“Hunger: A Memoir of (My) Body

Genre: Dysfunctional Relationships

Release Date: June 13, 2017

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From the New York Times bestselling author of Bad Feminist: a searingly honest memoir of food, weight, self-image, and learning how to feed your hunger while taking care of yourself.

“I ate and ate and ate in the hopes that if I made myself big, my body would be safe. I buried the girl I was because she ran into all kinds of trouble. I tried to erase every memory of her, but she is still there, somewhere. . . . I was trapped in my body, one that I barely recognized or understood, but at least I was safe.”

In her phenomenally popular essays and long-running Tumblr blog, Roxane Gay has written with intimacy and sensitivity about food and body, using her own emotional and psychological struggles as a means of exploring our shared anxieties over pleasure, consumption, appearance, and health. As a woman who describes her own body as “wildly undisciplined,” Roxane understands the tension between desire and denial, between self-comfort and self-care. In Hunger, she explores her past—including the devastating act of violence that acted as a turning point in her young life—and brings readers along on her journey to understand and ultimately save herself.

With the bracing candor, vulnerability, and power that has made her one of the most admired writers of her generation, Roxane explores what it means to learn to take care of yourself: how to feed your hunger for delicious and satisfying food, a smaller and safer body, and a body that can love and be loved—in a time when the bigger you are, the smaller your world becomes.


Roxane Gay’s writing has appeared in Best American Mystery Stories 2014, Best American Short Stories 2012, Best Sex Writing 2012, Oxford American, American Short Fiction, West Branch, Virginia Quarterly Review, NOON, The New York Times Book Review, Bookforum, Time, The Los Angeles Times, The Nation, The Rumpus, Salon, The Wall Street Journal’s Speakeasy culture blog, and many others. She is the co-editor of PANK and essays editor for The Rumpus. She teaches writing at Eastern Illinois University. Her novel, She is the author of three books–Ayiti, An Untamed State, and Bad Feminist. She very much wants a tiny baby elephant.

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